My Self-Acceptance Journey and 5 Tips For When You’re Feeling Negative About Yourself
I’ve been on my own journey of self-acceptance for several years. And I think this is how it will always be – I don’t expect to wake up one day and completely accept my body. As I age and change, I’ll have new parts of my body and mind that I’ll need to get used to – and I’m okay with that!
I, like I’m sure you have too, have had a lot going on in the last few years. This has caused my body to fluctuate in shape and size a lot and my mind to constantly flit between being happy and sad (the way my body looks and how I’m feeling aren’t always connected). Between the pandemic, a job change (which I am very happy & grateful for, but it has it’s stresses), my Father passing away and general life ups & downs, I’ve not taken proper care of my mind or body.
The pandemic was a very mixed experience for me. I finally launched this blog and was able to spend time on my passion of creating content. But I very rarely left the house, so spent a lot of my days just eating so I had something to do. Even as the world started to open back up again, I’ve still not been that good to myself. But I’m working on that!
I’ve struggled with how I look for a while. I was rarely the one that attracted the opposite sex, unless I was wearing something that showed my boobs (and then I’d just get them asking if they could touch them – no random man in a club, you can’t…). It wasn’t until I moved for university and started to learn more about myself and the world that I stopped caring as much; I was too busy enjoying myself and creating new memories.
I’ve written a few blog posts about my self-acceptance journey, which I have linked below:
· The Beginner’s Guide To Self-Acceptance – Part 1
· The Beginner’s Guide To Self-Acceptance – Part 2
· How Other People Helped Me Learn To Accept Myself
· How To Be Your Own Best Friend
· My Relationship With My Body Hair
As this is a journey, I still get times where I feel unhappy with the way that I look or what my mind is thinking. So, here are a few things that I do to help me get through – and I hope they can help you too!
Assess Your Feelings
It’s important to think about why you’re thinking negatively about yourself. Has someone said something? Have you been looking at old photos? Have you been looking at creators who don’t look like you? Are you just having a bad day and you’re self-sabotaging?
Whatever the reason, it’s unlikely that whatever you’re telling yourself is true. I know that when I’m having a bad day, I end up blaming myself and picking myself apart – obviously, making myself feel worse. But that isn’t going to get me anywhere. When you’re having a bad day, it’s even more important to be kind to yourself.
If things are feeling too overwhelming, try writing how you’re feeling down. And when you’re feeling good, write some positive things about yourself, so you can re-read them when you’re not feeling so great!
Put On An Outfit That Makes You Feel Good
Putting on an outfit that makes you feel good can be an instant mood booster! Whether it’s a matching loungewear set, a nice top & jeans combo, a pretty dress or something completely different – if it makes you feel good, put it on! And it doesn’t matter if you don’t have anywhere to go. I got dressed up to do the food shop recently as I was feeling low, the outfit made me feel like I had my life together and helped me get through! Or, if you do feel like getting up and going out – do it – treat yourself!
Do Something That You Love
Whether that’s sitting in with a cuppa, spending time with family & friends, going out for a meal, going out dancing; whatever it is you love doing, make sure you give yourself time to do them!
When I’m feeling negative about myself, my favourite thing to do is wrap myself up with a cuppa and watch some Netflix (this is also one of my favourite things to do in general). I take things slow and allow myself to truly relax and focus on just what’s going on around me.
Focusing on your senses is a great way to feel grounded and in the moment. Why don’t you take a second to do it now? Look around, what can you see? Is your view different close up and far away? What can you smell? Does it remind you of anything? What can you hear? Is it calming or is it adding to your stresses? What can you taste? Are you eating or drinking anything extra delicious right now? And finally, what can you touch? Don’t forget to touch yourself too! Doing this when your mind is super busy is a great way to bring you back to the present moment. Why don’t you leave your answers in the comments below!
Ask For Support
I’m sure that you’re surrounded by people who love you. Reach out and ask them what they love about you. It may seem silly, but sometimes having that reminder that the majority of your negative thoughts are just in your head, it can help! If you’re unsure about asking someone close to you, send me a message and I’ll hype you up!!
Remember That It’s A Journey and You Are Amazing!
As I said, it’s unlikely that we’ll just wake up one day and never dislike ourselves again – it’s a journey. But it’s important to give ourselves a break as we try and navigate the weird and wonderful world around us. No matter what life has thrown at you, you’re here reading this, and you are amazing!!
I hope you have a good day!
Cerys x
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I’d hoped that this post would be filled with me styling different outfits that I’ve been wearing in my 6 months postpartum. But truthfully I’ve spent most of my time in pyjamas or scruffy loungewear.
My body hasn’t “bounced back” like society suggested it should (I didn’t think it would), so a lot of my wardrobe doesn’t fit me.