Coffee With Cerys

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How Other People Helped Me Learn To Accept Myself

This post may be a bit controversial as we typically hear “you don’t need anyone else to prove your worth” etc. And obviously I don’t disagree! However, I have been lucky enough to have some people around me who are incredibly supportive and have made a big difference on my self-acceptance journey – so I wanted to talk about it.

There is a belief that you have to go through the journey of self-acceptance and self-love alone, but I completely disagree! We’re a social species so I think it’s natural to want support from other people (this doesn’t however mean that your worth is based on those other people – and that’s where the differentiation lies).

I think I’ve mentioned this before, but I properly started my self-acceptance journey when I moved to Liverpool and started university. Moving out and having more independence made me look at myself – who I was and what I wanted from life and realise that I didn’t really know. I was surrounded by new people, who didn’t know me, and I had to figure out who I was while getting to know them and my new living location. This was a really daunting experience, but I’m so glad that I started on this journey.

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So, here are some reasons as to how and why other people’s support has helped me on my self-acceptance journey.

Compliments Are Nice
My boyfriend will likely roll his eyes when he reads this as I’m not great at accepting compliments – but that doesn’t mean that I don’t appreciate them! Giving and receiving genuinely kind comments always gives me a warm feeling inside. Compliments are great to receive but they’re also great to give, especially when you can tell that the other person needed a bit of a pick me up.

If I’m feeling great in an outfit and someone compliments it, it adds to how good I feel. Maybe this isn’t a good thing, but it’s really helped me on my journey – so that’s a good thing to me.

Positivity Spreads Positivity
I’ve been reading about how our attitudes impact other people recently (super interesting btw). One important thing to remember is positivity really does spread positivity! My boyfriends love and my family & friends support helps me on my journey and makes me feel empowered. If I’m having a bad day and feeling a bit sorry for myself, my boyfriend simply being in a good mood and giving me a big squeeze instantly makes me feel better. His love and positivity remind me that I’m just having a bad day, but tomorrow will be better (and if it’s not, that’s okay too).

Also, making yourself smile, even when you don’t want to, is proven to make you feel better. “When you forcefully practice smiling, it stimulates the amygdala, which releases neurotransmitters to encourage an emotionally positive state” (source). Obviously, this isn’t a long-term solution. It’s still so important to feel your emotions. But sometimes we can get so caught up in feeling negative that we struggle to push through. Therefore, giving yourself a smile could be that little boost that you need to make yourself feel a bit better.

We’re All In This Together
Following other content creators on the same journey as me has definitely had an impact. Being around a community of likeminded people makes it less lonely and easier to do and I find it really inspiring. If you’re looking for some incredible self-acceptance creators to follow – click here.

Sharing Is Caring

This links to the point above. I follow creators who share their self-acceptance journey as it helps me – so I therefore share my journey in the hope to help you. There’s that old saying “a problem shared is a problem halved” – and I agree with this. When you see other people going through and experiencing things similar to you it can help you feel less alone and your problem easier to tackle.

Being told that the content I create helps others feel empowered helps prove to my negative mind that my content is worth it, and it makes me feel really good. I enjoy helping people, so your lovely comments & DM’s really do mean a lot to me!

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I hope this gives you an insight into why your self-acceptance journey doesn’t have to be lonely. I’m on the same journey as you. So, feel free to grab a cuppa and comment down below or send me a DM on Instagram if you want to chat about your journey.

And let me know your thoughts on this in the comments below.

 

Cerys x

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